~ All I wanted was to be happy but I did not know how. I had no clue where to start or what to do, so I started right where I was. I started in the exact place I didn’t want to be. My DESIRE to be truly happy is all it took to take the first step out of the life I wanted to leave behind and into the life I was about to create! ~
When the desire for lasting change and true happiness shows it’s beautiful and mighty face, it is time to take a leap of faith. Regardless of the circumstances that fuel your desire, the key to any level of change is to do it in a positive state of mind. The last thing you want to do is to hold onto anything negative or take it with you for that matter.
From this moment forward, every step must be born and nurtured from that place within, from your Inner Life. Each step must yield a great percentage of positivity. How can change occur or happiness blossom if what or how you choose to do things is through a negative state of mind. Life will be seemingly difficult if your foundation is built on or out of negativity.
The first step into my journey toward true happiness was the hardest because I was scared. I was facing so many negative consequences of how I had been living my life. I was truly lost and confused with no direction. I felt so alone and hopeless, but I knew I had to do something so I faced my fears head on starting with the truth. Writing down who I was at that moment in time, how I felt about myself, and the things I was doing to create my miserably unhappy life. This journal process did in fact create some pain, but it was only temporary. It was no worse than living the way I was living on a day-to-day basis. I took the bad with the good because I knew in my heart the only way back to me was to face the person in the mirror.
I had avoided myself for nearly 20 years because I did not like who I was. I was uncomfortable in my own skin and couldn’t stand a moment alone with myself. I tried everything under the sun to feel better but when nothing worked, I knew the time had come. I knew I had to face who I was before I could release who I had become. This did NOT involve going back through my entire past dredging up all the things I had regret. It involved sitting down with pen and paper and talking to myself in the present moment. I wrote about how I felt at that moment, I wrote about the things I was doing or not doing that were causing me to be unhappy. I wrote about my self-sabotaging behaviors. I even wrote about what was bringing me happiness so I would have something good to focus on. I questioned myself and my motives and before I knew it, I had pages and pages filled with words that not only brought me relief, but brought me clarity. When I was done, the answers were all right there in front of me. That was the end. There was no going back. I walked out of who I was not and right into the greater part of who I truly am.
There is nothing to regret, feel guilty over, wish you had done differently or carry pain for. Your transition into true and lasting happiness will in fact dissolve these feelings. The things you feared the most won’t create as much pain or upset you as you may have thought they would. This is because when you are in tune with your Inner Life, when you are focused on being happy and feeling happy, your reactions and thoughts change with the desire of wanting to feel good. You will react in a more positive manner, one that will not shatter your feelings of happiness.
Is this the time for you to look inside yourself and be honest? For you to tell the truth to yourself about yourself. The truth as to what you are doing or not doing that is creating your unhappiness and dissatisfaction with life. It is not life not giving you what you want, it is you not giving you what you want. Now is the time to face your own truth. To be completely honest with yourself no matter where you are in your life. I know it can be hard to admit certain things about ourselves but it is the only way to set yourself free and to be able to move forward. We all know in our hearts what it is we need to do and what it is we need to change, so take the first step. It WILL change everything!
If true and lasting happiness is what you seek, seek first from within. Live, breathe and be your Inner Life. Quiet your mind, focus solely on the present moment and allow the power of your Inner Life guide you to where you want to be. – Cindy Ortiz
Live, Love & Breathe Life
Love & Light,