The True Way of Forgiveness

15Although I would prefer to live a life completely filled with joy, happiness and peace, we all know it is nearly impossible.  We all know there will be life experiences that hurt us, make us angry, take us to our knees, or leave us completely torn and breathless.  Some of the most difficult experiences come from our relationships and learning forgiveness.  Just recently, a very wonderful and wise man in my life reminded me of the true way of forgiveness.

When a life experience calls for forgiveness, more than likely we have made it quite clear what this person did to hurt US.  More than likely we spoke without love, compassion or understanding.  More than likely we reacted with anger, hostility and even feelings of hatred.  More than likely we didn’t give the other person a fighting chance.  More than likely we never thought about their pain or why they did what they did.  We just know they did US wrong and now we want to punish them and hurt them the way they hurt us.

Prayer 01Forgiving someone is not only vital to our own well-being, but it is also vital to the other persons well-being, sense of self, and ability to move forward.  When people do wrong, we should forgive them, comfort them, show them love, and guide them in a more positive direction.  We shouldn’t punish them or rub it in their face day in and day out.  This will only create negativity, resentment and more than likely it will destroy the relationship. 

Many will disagree, but there is nothing in this world that is not forgivable if one takes the time to come to a deep understanding of where the other persons wrong came from.  A negative action always comes from a place of fear or pain.  It never comes from a place of love, joy or happiness.  Sometimes our wrongs even come from self-sabotage because we can’t find the love within ourselves to make the right choices or decisions.  Many times we are so wrapped up in our fear, pain and negativity that we lose all hope.

There are some who believe that forgiveness is the same as saying what was done is acceptable, but it has nothing to do with what is acceptable and what isn’t.  It is about truly loving yourself and another enough to move through it with love, understanding and compassion.  Where you want it to go from there is completely up to you.  We all make mistakes and we all want to be forgiven so don’t treat those you love in any other way except the way you would want to be treated if it were you. 

70The true way of forgiveness is in fact through your Inner Life.  It is in fact about love, not punishment.  When it’s all said and done, just let it go.  There is absolutely no reason whatsoever to carry it with you, for if you do, your life will turn in an unwanted direction and you could very easily lose a relationship that really wasn’t worth losing.  Open your heart and allow yourself the beauty and freedom of the true way of forgiveness.

If true and lasting happiness is what you seek, seek first from within. Live, breathe and be your Inner Life. Quiet your mind, focus solely on the present moment and allow the power of your Inner Life guide you to where you want to be …

Love & Light,

Cindy Ortiz

Be the Change that YOU Desire!

52If you have a desire for change, you can start right from where you are. There is no need to go backwards to get to where you want to be. If you know what you want half the battle is over. The past is the past and it no longer exists, so don’t let it exist within you. Whatever it is you want to change or do different, just do it. Do not sit around beating yourself up over what you have done wrong or what you could have done differently. This will only keep you from moving forward.

Every moment you have is an opportunity to be who YOU want to be and do what YOU want to do. Be the change that YOU desire. You do not need anyone else’s permission. If someone in your life tries to discourage you, it is only because of their own insecurities and fears. Stay focused and present in every moment, for it is every moment that will create the next moment.

41For some, change is as simple as making the decision to change. For others, it is more difficult. If you find change difficult, it is simply because you are living more in your outer life than you are living through your Inner Life. Your outer life creates fear, resistance and negativity. Whereas, your Inner Life creates peace, joy and an unshakeable knowing that all is well.

Where you are is okay and there is nothing “wrong”. You are where you are because of your choices, thought patterns and beliefs. It is okay to accept where you are. This doesn’t mean staying idle, it means coming to terms with who and where you are and then taking the steps to get you to where you want to be.

39If you want to change yourself, your life and/or your patterns of thought, choose to do the opposite of that which you are doing now. If you think negative thoughts, choose to think positive thoughts. If you are an unkind person, choose to be kinder. If you are an alcoholic, choose not to drink and go to a meeting. If you are unhappy, choose to be happy and do something that feels good. If your life is boring, choose different activities to spice it up a little.

If you find yourself slipping back into your old patterns, and you will at first, just remember where and who you are – you are this moment and this moment only. Stop, take a breath, know that you have a choice, and be who you NOW want to be. The desire for change is just the beginning – you can do it, so just do it!

If true and lasting happiness is what you seek, seek first from within. Live, breathe and be your Inner Life. Quiet your mind, focus solely on the present moment and allow the power of your Inner Life guide you to where you want to be …

Love & Light,

Cindy

Their Path Is Not Wrong, It’s Just Theirs

08It hurts to see someone we love struggle with life especially when we know what it feels like.  One of the greatest things I have learned throughout my journey is that everyone is on their own unique path.  No matter where they are or what they are doing, their path is not wrong, it’s just theirs.  It’s theirs to do whatever they want to do with it – good or bad. 

When we see someone struggling, we sometimes have the tendency to step off our path and onto theirs.  In our effort to help, we put ourselves to the side, but in the end, it doesn’t help them and it doesn’t help us.  It doesn’t help them because eventually their path is not going to work for us so they will be left feeling abandoned and alone when we make the choice to go back to our own path.  It doesn’t help us because when we take the path of another we lose ourselves in the other person’s struggles which leads to becoming out of tune with our Inner Life.

96What I have discovered is that we can help others without stepping off our own path.  We can help by being an example of a positive life ~ a happy life.  We can encourage and support those around us without compromising our own happiness.  We share our own struggles of the past, giving them hope that they too can change their life. We lend guidance to show them that there is in fact a “better” way ~ a more fulfilling, abundant and joyful way of dealing with and overcoming life’s unwanted experiences. 

In trying to help those we love, or anyone for that matter, there is always a chance they will not be ready or willing to try another path.  For whatever reason, this too is okay.  There is no path that is wrong.  If the other person chooses to continue their struggle with no effort in changing things, it doesn’t mean your efforts have failed.  It just means they need to remain where they are even if they don’t know why. 

686It can be hard when someone chooses to stay where they are.  It’s hard because you know there is a happier way.  This is when you need to remain strong and you need to remain on your own path.  It is not a time to judge or criticize but to love unconditionally.  Accept them for who they are and where they are.  If their actions and behaviors are causing you pain, it may be time to walk away.  Rest assured, when the time comes, when they are ready to end their suffering, there is no doubt they will do whatever it takes to create a life more in tune with their true desires and dreams.  A life more in tune with their Inner Life, the greater part of who they truly are.

If true and lasting happiness is what you seek, seek first from within. Live, breathe and be your Inner Life. Quiet your mind, focus solely on the present moment and allow the power of your Inner Life guide you to where you want to be …

Love & Light,

Cindy